When my daughter was born I thought I had experienced the ultimate high. The rush was very long lasting and deep. She had been born at midnight and I wandered the streets of my town until dawn.
When I arrived at work that afternoon I was still feeling it. I think it wore off about three years later.
When I play, I feel some of that same rush. And it lasts and lasts. Like the water reaching me on the beach, there are ebbs and flows but it is recognizable and somewhat relentless; long after the gig. And I crave it as an addict would. There are few lulls in that need. It is an extermely determined desire...this passion to play. To play with others and make a connection, to play for others and make another magical connection that although different, is nonetheless very energetic and integral to the high I feel.
When a show is over, the first rush is a breathless feeling of being spent. As we sit and enjoy a coke and talk over the show, the energy returns. It builds again. No desire to catch your breath...it is wondrous to be used and tired and yet aching to go again. A song starts in the jukebox and the impulse we all share is to grab our instruments and jam along. Begin anew.
I can imagine playing to our deaths. Ignoring the bodies call for sustenance or rest...just riding that crest for a long, long time.
My season of creativity is looming. As the days shorten, words tumble out and melodies flow.Another high altogether. One that needs an appreciative audience. Mixing the live performance with the introspective process of creation is a delicate balance, but very rewarding when done well. This I must learn.
I look forward to getting high for the rest of my days. My hope is some of the audience also reap that same buzz from our evening on stage.
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