Instead of seeing your inner critic as an adversary...see it for what it is. A critical voice.
What is it trying to tell you?
Why do you see it as evil?
A friend who is immersed in a class, came running home from school one day to explain to me how my drunken monkey is trying to tell me something and that it is worth my time to listen to what my inner critic has to say.
It is there for a reason.
It has a point.
So I need to embrace the message I have been ignoring. What is it trying to tell me?
I haven't a clue...yet. But at least now, I am listening.
A friend once taught me the need for the right attitude; not just a positive one...the right one.
What a huge difference a slight movement in vision can make.
2012 has been the pits from a strategic, rational mind.
I've Lost:
My Father
My Job of eleven years
My FaceBook account - the nefariousness sneaker hackers have struck me twice
So many people in the world of music
On a ledger, there is not much to speak for 2012 as a good year.
And yet...I am happy. I am satisfied with my sound - I like my guitars voice. I acknowledge my inner saxophone player. It is who I wanted to be since I heard from the Dave Clark Five.
I am not Beppe Gambetta - I can't flat pick worth a tinkers dam.
But I can channel my inner Coltrane, my Bird.
Shit, what's wrong with that? Absol-fucking-lutely nothing.
I was rehearsing for July 4th and I found myself just smiling.
"Are you okay, man?"
"You look goofy..."
Everything is pretty damned good. I have more to be grateful for than to piss about.
Embrace the inner you. I knew this when I was fifteen (I think we all hear this voice) and it submerged when I married. Only to resurface with a vengeance.
By digging the guy, the musician I am, I am free to enjoy everything around me.
Ever watch Grey's Anatomy? Most of the cast act as if surgery defines them...is what makes them tick. Is who they are.
And to a degree I can see their point. I have thought about what I would do were playing guitar taken away from me and have generally thought of composing or teaching - finding another aspect of music to find fulfillment.
But I think now, I see how that would be somewhat lacking.
I was called to an informal jam session yesterday and found myself having a blast because and solely because I was doing what I love and doing it well with a group of people.
The music was old and tired, the crowd...much the same. Far too much beer and burgers and not enough mineral water and carrots...listen to me. But we are an older crowd, right? So act our age? I wanted a martini, anyway.
But in any case, I was having fun. Because I had a guitar in hand and a source of energy to feed from.
Audience is crucial to a good performance. In my studio, I sound okay. In front of a crowd, I sound great.
I thought it a matter of discipline but instead found it to be energy driven. By myself I can become uninspired. It takes effort to explore a new sound to play something new at all. The rut of 'alone' is deep, whether it is musically or in life in general.
But a crowd? An appreciative crowd? Now I am very energetic and incredibly inspired. I feed off of the crowd. They tell me what to play through energy level alone. One person clapping and whistling drives you, a room full and you are flying.
So for the thirty of so people that were drinking too much and barbecuing the neighbors into submission...thanks. I needed that.
Learning to please oneself is not easy, but I am working on it.
Or - How to Have Two Competing, Diametrically Opposed Ideas Exist In Your Head
A friend mentioned that I haven't been seeing as many acts as I had in years past.
I thought for a second...But I have played twice as many gigs.
Perspective...as a good friend put it, is what you marinate in. If you live to see acts then yes, I have been slacking. If you live to rack up miles in your car I am an abysmal failure.
We each have a unique perspective.
I live to integrate all the other perspectives...however foreign or distasteful they may be...initially.
I find I am quick to react - a true kneejerk reactionary. Yep.
No...I don't like it...more to read?...learn something new?
And then...something magical occurs.
Mr. Hyde goes away. Given a minute to reflect and I find I am now saying...
Yes, I love it, more to read! I want to learn more! Fill me.
Why the face is that? I am completely schizophrenic to harbor both schools of thought within the same head inside of five minutes...aren't I?
Okay, so I learned twenty years ago to let any initial negative reaction sit and simmer for a minute. I still slip now and then, but by reflecting and finding the change, I am centered and I know I am right.
I need to change my sauce!
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I am really not enjoying 2012 - too many people taken from me. And yet I find myself intensely thankful for what I have.
(See the title)
I think what I ask for most often, more than than guidance or money or happiness is perspective to see the world as it is.
The replacement HALO arrived from Sweetwater, a day ahead of schedule, no less.
I don't know how much hand holding one should expect with a fairly pricey pedal, or any other piece of equipment. I am a low maintenance customer for the most part. If the equipment works as advertised, I am generally happy. I know what I want before I go shopping. I don't pepper the vendor with questions or opinions or requests.
After signing the FEDEX guys autograph book, (I can dream, can't I?) I took the package inside and opened it. Yep, the same type of box with the same packing material.
Deep breath.
I plugged in the patch cables and yes, it lit up on the internal battery. I grabbed my shiny new Dunlop 18 VDC power supply and plugged it in and then inserted the cylindrical connector into the HALO.
Thank you God it lit up a bit brighter. I took the battery out and reinserted the power supply connector.
Oh gud gawd...it lit up. (I just love these happy endings)
So kudos to Jorge and Eryk at Sweetwater for taking the steps to keep me happy.
That is customer service.
And to Alex Aguilar, not only for thinking up this miracle in a box, but he too, kept in touch throughout the entire episode.
And Rick who introduced me to the pedal.
And so friends, that concludes the story of Sweetwater and the Halo.
Sweetwater emailed to say the replacement will arrive next Wednesday and provided a tracking number.
I am upset somewhat that I have to "replant" my old set up for the pedal board for the gigs this weekend.
Ah well, I will make this sacrifice...sigh.
This thing is worth a few clips.
See you on Wednesday. Sweetwaters Website.
Ask for Jorge. Tell him 'e' sent you.
I contacted Sweetwater concerning the HALO pedal that I had received. Within a day I had a shipping label in hand and got to drop the package off and send it on its way.
To their further credit Sweetwater offered to refund my money for both the pedal and the power supply. I declined as I'd rather have a HALO and the recommended power supply on my pedal board in the end.
I have a couple of gigs upcoming and my big disappointment is that I won't have my HALO with me.
Alex Aguilar makes a great pedal, he is also making amps. I smell one in my future.
I have a large collection of stomp pedals. Enough to fill two pedal boards.
Most of the pedals I own are low end, mass produced products.
$30 DanElectro pedals - A Chorus and a 10 Band EQ
Three Vox pedals - a 847A Wah and an ICE-9 OverDrive And a Satchurator distortion pedal. $90, and $130
twice.
A couple of Marshall pedals I found on eBay since they are no longer made - The Guv'vor and a BluesBreaker. $50 and $50.
An MXR Compressor - $80
You get the idea...relatively inexpensive pedals. Hell, I play relatively inexpensive guitars.
So why did I get genuinely interested in a $400 pedal?
A friend I have known for forty years had invited me to his house last year to try one. I liked it, but could not see the need to replace my ICE-9 and my Satchurator, and certainly not for $400. No pedal is that good.
Then I start watching YouTube videos for the pedal.
The pedal reacts to your attack. You strum harder and it sounds sharper and with more drive. It is reactive to your play? It also has two levels of gain so you can preset two distinct sounds.
A bit of OD on one and a bit of OD and Clipping on two. And what kind of clipping? Symmetrical, asymmetrical or none.
And then apply that clipping to either channel or both.
A tone knob, and then three more knobs to fine tune the bass, middle and treble.
True bypass and two volume knobs to set levels across the board - off and channel one and two.
$400.
But it is the first pedal I'd be able to call an amp in a box.
I got the chance to play with one while doing some Stones tunes and the ability to dial in the exact sound I knew I wanted was unsettling.
And easily.
The trouble with many pedals is once you introduce them into your chain, they so alter the sound that they take you back to changing all the settings on your amp and the other pedals. They set you back to square one.
With this HALO installed I got to remove three pedals - the ICE-9, the Satchurator and the Guv'nor. As they became redundant, adding nothing but noise.
Tune in next time when we find out how well Sweetwater handles the issue with the pedal - it doesn't work with the power supply on my pedal board reducing it to battery only.
Not a real option in my world.
A new power supply is arriving tomorrow, failing that I'll send it back and we'll see how well they provide customer service. This is a hallmark of Sweetwater and it is on test.
When I called Sweetwater to let them know I had a problem, they in turn emailed Alex...who called me while I was on the road. The guy that designed & made the pedal called to assure me it would be taken care of!
Un-freaking-believable.
As my pal who first demo'ed the pedal for me said, "Insanely good customer service company calling..."
The Harmonic Amp-Like OverDrive has passed all tests so far with flying colors. Alairex HALO
