Fear - Kick It To The Curb

I understand why evolution found fear useful.
But in todays world, it needs refining.
Toned down a notch or two.
Or more.

Most regrets faced during mid-life crisis are rooted in a fear.
Men get a motorcycle and a girlfriend - conquer death and the other mortal fear - women.
How many of our actions while growing up were driven by fear?
Fear of appearing stupid.
Fear of being perceived as not manly. "Queer."
Fear of not fitting in?
Fear of rejection?
That over riding, palm staining, stomach churning case of nerves...butterflies...fear.

Now when I go to perform, I get nervous...fear - but it sharpens me?
Fear being used the way nature intended.
The application of the emotion is where the fault lies.
When I stand backstage, awaiting to be called on stage, my stomach feels the exact same way it feels when I talk to a woman who I feel is "beyond" me.
Once I get on stage I begin to feel calm.
Once the first song starts my fear is forgotten...completely.

But when I seek the company of a woman I think is beyond me and my stomach starts to quake it doesn't aid me, it hinders me.
Is that the inner voice of reason/God speaking the truth to us?

It's not so much that I have conquered fear, rather I have confronted it and acknowledged it.
And have told my fear that I would not be subservient to it any longer.

When I met a woman whom my inner voice told me was too familiar to be true, I knew no fear.
Only a sense of wonder and discovery - about the two of us and about myself.

I guess the emotion does work.
My bad.



Why the confusion between the two?